Posting tweet...
My favorite Rapper Drake is on Fabolous’ remix to ‘Throw It In Bag’. In the verse Drake talks about dating an older woman. When I first heard the song (fire btw) I didn’t think twice about it. Today I go to MTV.com and Drake Is talking to Sway about how it is a true story. I’m like “word”? Check out the interview below.
That kind of blows my mind. The oldest guy I’ve ever dated was 27 and I was 21. I thought that was crazy….this ish is CUR-AZY! What do you think?
So, the other day my ex and I were talking…and then it turned into somewhat of an argument. I have no clue as to why, but it got there. Anyway, she made a statement that greatly intrigued me. She said that,
”When you talk to me you claim you have no females and that you don’t go out with them. But when you are around the guys you brag about how many females you have and what you have done with them.”
I found this interesting because for one..it’s not true of course. And secondly, I have noticed this about some men that surround me. I’m constantly being teased at my work place because I do not go out to get sex from females; I’m being called a virgin on a consistent basis. And what makes it so bad is that I’m 21…I’m the youngest in my work place. The other men range from 38-60 years of age. And this is really shocking to me because I really thought that only guys around my age were cocky, boastful, and STUPID.. but it seems that I have been proven wrong. My question is why is it that some men, humans of my own gender, feel that they need to have sex and boast about it to be viewed at as a man? Is it that they’re insecure ,or have they not grown up yet? This deeply worries me because it seems that with each passing day, women are being viewed more like objects rather than the human beings with feelings that they really are. Men act as if chivalry is dead, and you are labeled a ‘fag’ for believing in such a thing; so I am told on a consistent basis. Things have to change. Love seems to be nonexistent.. people don’t care about one another’s feelings… babies are being popped out on regular basis..men are not even acting like men..It seems as if the world is once again shifting back in time to where the male is dominant in every way and the male ego is just as important..We need to come up with a way to break away from this mindset before some men becomes every man and there really are no good men left.
Planned Parenthood released what I think is a wonderful ad in 2007. This is the sort of thing that I think would grab teens’ everybody’s attention. Of course due to the graphic nature involved it would garner both negative and positive feedback, mostly negative more than likely. That very reason is probably why it was never seen in bus shelters or magazines. But with that being said, it doesn’t change the fact that people are attracted and pay attention to sexually charged ads, so at least this one has a positive message.
Contraception needs to be at the forefront of our minds when thinking about sex and not an after thought. Planned Parenthood is not naive, they know that people come up with 101 excuses as to why protection wasn’t used, so I think they would rather promote another way to have intercourse that wouldn’t cause unplanned pregnancy. I think the ad is smart and funny and should be taken with a grain of salt. Focus should be on the message not on the image. There are far too many children having children, I, and I think Planned Parenthood, would rather children have anal sex. Um..you know what I mean =)
–Jay
I pulled back the lips of my vagina and showed it to my doll. I then turned to my friend and told her to show hers to the doll as well. I was 6, maybe 7 tops. It is my earliest recollection I have of exploring my sexuality and although I did get in trouble after my friend told on me, I still don’t think it was wrong. I watch a video like the one above and wonder if it is entirely innocent or disturbingly corrupted. Aside from the beginning when he is humping the bed *awkward* I tend to lean towards the former. A 10-year-old boy should be allowed to be fascinated by breasts and why not, they are pretty cool. *however I’m not really a fan of the fact that he uses such mature slang but his expressions are roll over weezing funny.
“Do you want to see my boobies?”
Before he could answer she lifted her frilly skirt above her chin, while his jaw dropped. He ran out of the unisex bathroom and told his friends. From that point on they spent majority of their days in Day Care devising plans on how to see and touch breasts. He was 4.
I was talking about this today with my roommate how during our mid-teens we read all that we could on sex and now…not so much. I think we go through several peaks and valleys in concern to our sexual curiosity, I also think for many the ages of 3-5 are the beginnings. Then we find out about koodies and forget about private parts until we are old enough to warrant privacy.
So I pose these questions to you: do you think early signs of sexual interest are abnormal or to be discouraged? Would your heart break if you found out your four-year-old son was caught feeling up another little girl in pre-school? How do you feel about this video? Finally what is your earliest recollection of sexual exploration?
Sometimes I tend to take sex so seriously. Dissecting, analysing and researching every nuance of it. Then I watch a video like this and after getting over how offensive it is, I can’t help but laugh at how basic/ primal/ and uncool looking sex truly is. I love the part where the guy crab walks over to the girl’s ass then starts dry humping the poo outta her – in my heart of all hearts sometimes I believe this is how men truly want to behave lol. I hate the parts where you can’t see the girl’s faces at all. So…I have a love/ hate relationship with this video but since I can’t decide if it’s more degrading to men or women, I’m just gonna call it a draw and enjoy!
Only On The L Word
Watch from minute 8:00 until the end.
“Which, I don’t know if you know this, is the primary sex act two women can actually have, and then you go ahead and belittle it by turning it into pornography. I think the reason why you are doing this is because men can’t handle it that these women can have this amazing, fucking, beautiful, mind blowing orgasm without a fucking cock!”
Preach it Jenny! Preach it!
Before we even start, a little clarity now for a little focus later: THiS iS NoT A jUDGmENt AGaiNsT HoMoSeXuALS oR HOMosExuALITy. In fact, it’s regarding different rights altogether: it’s a question of whether CHRISTIAN rights have been, in fact, similarly violated.
My pastor is Bible-based— as any pastor who calls himself a ‘pastor’, i.e. “man of God”/”man of God’s Word, should be. He doesn’t make up stuff as he goes; he takes what God put in the Book, and teaches it to us so that we can live in a way that pleases God. Because, for a Christian, at the end of the day, it’s not about pleasing ourselves but pleasing Him, right?
Well, not too long ago, my pastor was invited to teach/preach in Oakland, California. He travels all the time, so it was no big thing… except, his invitation came with an addendum. Something to the effect of, “Whatever you do, don’t preach against homosexuality out here; it’s against the law. It’s considered a hate crime.”
Needless to say, the entire church shifted in their seats as he informed us of this. Most people, of course, thought to themselves, “Homosexuality is,” —AND AGAIN, THIS ARTICLE IS NOT A JUDGMENT AGAINST HOMOSEXUALS OR HOMOSEXUALITY— “against God’s will, and how can the state dictate what the church teaches to it’s own believers?”
Me, my mind was focused on something a little different: the idea of a hate crime.
See, the idea of a hate crime is that… you hafta hate somebody. Either, you have to cause harm to somebody in the name of hate, or you have to speak ill of somebody or encourage harm to be done to somebody in the name of hate. THAT’S a hate crime.
—And before I go any further, let me say this as well: Christians often err in that some of us hate the sinners instead of hating the sin; forgetting that we ourselves are still sinners, even if we have been redeemed. God, indeed, does love everyone [which DOESN'T mean anyone is exempt from His authority or judgment, by the way], and we are ordered also love everyone and live peacefully with everyone, whether they agree with His word or not. But that does NOT mean we compromise and agree with the ways other people choose to live—
Not many people understand just how scary it is to be yourself. Many think they understand, but few actually do. Not many understand that I am NOT over exaggerating when I tell them “I risk my life ever time I step out that door.”
Hi. My name is Cristina Marrero, and I am a Christian dyke living in the crotch of the Bible belt.
My therapist is obsessed with understanding how it is I am secure in my sexuality AND faith. I talk to her about relationships, life, school…everything. Here is the thing that fascinates her: I talk about all these things just like anyone else would. My life does not revolve around a label. Yeah, I talk about it on here, but that is because this is a forum designed to talk about ALL aspects of sex and sexuality. In everyday life I do not go around saying, “Hi! I’m Cristina, and I am a homosexual!” I do not go around introducing myself and then adding, “And just to let you know… I want to marry a woman someday.”
I grew up liking trucks. I grew up being introduced to pink bows, and pretty dresses, but tearing them up when I went to go play with the boys. I had hair down to my butt until I was 7 years old and DEMANDED the monstrosity be cut off. When you have almost curly hair that reaches to your waist… dear Father in heaven that is going to hurt when you try to de-tangle! Long hair was a pain, dresses made it harder to move in, bows fell of, and I was a feminist from the start. A different kind of feminist though, because even in those groups… I didn’t and don’t really fit in.
You see, I don’t believe in one group of people being better than the other. I don’t believe one needing empowerment and the other needing to be put down. I believe in this simple philosophy, “Who the hell gives a crap.” You heard me. It does not matter what is between your legs, how big your chest is, what color your hair is, race, who someone loves, how someone ties their shoes or brushes their teeth. It does not matter because what matters are these: truth (little t: read Genderqueer), love, harmony, peace, communication, understanding, respect, and integrity. In the end, we all just need a trip back to pre-school so we can re learn the importance the art of sharing and working together really holds.
But back to the little kid me. In pre-school, I once got in trouble for punching a little boy in the gut. I said I wanted to be a fire fighter, and the little brat–I mean boy–said girls could not be fire fighters. Only boys could be fire fighters. I took offense to what I would later learn was called a “dumb-ass.” My mother was called in to pick me up and have a nice chat with me. Her words word, “No matter how wrong and stupid the opinion may be… it is that individuals opinion, and you can’t go around hitting people with different opinions than your own. No matter how stupid the opinion may be.” Thus was the age I took on the philosophy of peaceful resistance with a smart ass attitude. Cue innocent smile.
I recently wrote a poem about my upcoming marriage, wherein I remarked: I can’t help/doubting that one piece of paper/representing a faith we don’t hold/and a law we sometimes break/will change our lives/when it won’t even change my last name.
The next day, I got a comment (from someone I don’t know) that managed to jolt me out of sleepiness and into brain activity at 7:30 a.m. Anyone interested can read the full comment on my blog, but here’s an excerpt:
So why the rush to get married then? I suppose that’s the natural question to ask. Aside from loving someone so much that you want to spend forever (or something like that) with them. I want to know what a feminist, future sex columnist sees in this failing institution.
So now, without further ado (and with Shannon’s okay), I’m going to eat my words about Carrie Bradshaw and post a total relationship piece on a sex blog.
Perhaps one of the most interesting conversations I have had online was with a young woman who worked in the adult entertainment industry. She grew up in the Caribbean and was sexually molested and raped as a child. In elementary school she was labeled a slut, so she decided to add a pricetag to the word…
Shannon: What are some major misconceptions that others have about people who work in the porn industry?
Interviewee: That we are unholy, have no morals, basically that we are the bottom of the earth and have no respect for ourselfs, and have no goals or ambitious in life.
S: What is the most important lesson you’ve learned about sex through your work in the porn industry?
I: As long as your in the industry outside people of the industry will never respect you.
S: Do you think your past has a lot to do with what business you ended up in?
I: Part of it does. I got a jump start on how some men think of women as objects or toys they can pull out a box and put away when they are board but I have always thought outside the box. My past is not forcing me into the industry my past made me understand how most men see women. I choose to be in the industry to be accepted by a community who understands what it’s like to feel labeled a black sheep and unwanted and turning it to have so many men desire them and never have them.
S: In my conversations with others about sexual abuse they usually explain that in the aftermath of the attack(s) most victims either become extremely protective of their body or extremely unattached. Do you feel unattached?
I: I am extremely unattached I feel like my body doesn’t even belong to me. Since the majority of my life I felt I had no voice, having a voice is very weird to me and it’s weird because being in the industry I am around people who actually listen to me and actually respect what I want.
S: Alright so to recap: you like the porno industry because it gives you a sense of control over your sexuality because everyone’s intentions are written – there are no lies.
I: Exactly, everyone is on the same playing field so there is no power struggle. I know I control what goes on.
I’m not here to preach… exactly. But if you ever want some evidence that sex was meant for a particular context— marriage— here’s some scary-but-true things to consider:
1. In a hood near you, there are baby-daddies running around having babies by multiple girls that, literally, live right down the street from each other. And, in many cases, the girls don’t even realize that they share sperm donors. That’s a problem. Let’s do a quick review of some scientific facts:
When people who share genetic material ‘get busy’, what happens is, the likelihood of mental retardation and birth defects in the offspring goes up-up-up. God made incest immoral for us Christians, but that alone is enough to make it illegal to Western society at large.
So… Did it ever occur to you that there’s a distinct possibility these children— who were born of the same father— MIGHT grow up around and interact with each other unknowingly? Did it ever occur to you that, when those illegitimate kids become hormonal teenagers, there’s a possibility that they may, in fact, become sexually active… with each other? Total strangers meet and become intimate, engaging in casual sex, having no idea that they’re half-brothers and half-sisters by the same father. And all of a sudden— when fate would have it that they mistakenly conceive a child— it comes out with deformities. And no one can figure out why.
It will happen. It has happened. It is happening. And it is increasing.
2. True story: a nightclub in Atlanta holds a free HIV screening in the name of AIDS awareness… and over 2/3 of the people in the club are HIV positive. That’s a majority, by the way.
Now, consider just how many clubs are in Atlanta altogether… Then consider the fact that many people in Atlanta who go to the club go to more than one club per night. Intentions? To profile, socialize, get drunk dance, get drunk, have sex, in that order. So, if 2/3 of ONE Atlanta club is HIV positive, and these people frequent MULTIPLE Atlanta clubs, then it’s VERY likely that OTHER clubs have high numbers of HIV cases as well. After all, contrary to popular belief, HIV isn’t the common cold yet; it’s treatable, but once you’ve got it, you’ve got it. The number of cases can only get bigger, not smaller.
Consider also that most people who have HIV/AIDS don’t know it. That goes for Atlanta, too. And the key to effective treatment is early diagnosis. Untreated, HIV becomes AIDS…
Bottom line: consider a major metropolitan city with a major population of HIV-to-full-blown-AIDS cases walking around. Not enough awareness to stop the cycle, not enough treatment to go around.
It will happen. It has happened. It is happening. And it is increasing.
3. Between the Internet and late-night Girls Gone Wild commercials, there’s enough young women (and men) engaging in pornography to rebuild Sodom and Gomorrah (biblical references, look ‘em up). And that’s not including the people who watch them…
Here’s the clincher though: out of the thousands and thousands of young people engaged in it, how many of them are just “going through a phase” and don’t realize it yet? It may be 10, maybe 12 years down the road, but how many of these young people are only rebels of the moment, doomed to one day regret abusing their sexual freedom?
Once your face— among other things— is put out there… how do you get your identity back?
If it seems unrealistic, consider Facebook: if you merely write the wrong things on a Facebook page and a potential employer discovers it, you could be denied a position based on that alone. Heck, you could HAVE a job with an employer, and be FIRED from that job based on Facebook alone.
So how much more at risk is a young man or young woman who bares all and does all on camera? Aside from all moral and legal arguments, that’s THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of bright futures put in jeopardy… for a Spring Break of skin… or a commissioned payday.
It will happen. It has happened. It is happening. And it is increasing.
What I’m trying to say is that, once again, we as a society have gotten ahead of ourselves. We’re making decisions with our sexualities that are setting us all up for a lot of tragedy in the relatively near future. I only mentioned the above three examples because citing some of my other ‘favorites’ would be redundant. By now, you’ve got to realize what a little infidelity does to families; what past sexual abuse does to future relationships; what a lack of knowledge does to unsuspecting teens.
I’m hoping that by placing the emphasis on less suspected, more “pandemic” situations, the importance of sexual responsibility will be even more greatly recognized.
…Ya know, my greatest fear for humanity is that, since apocalypses don’t happen often, we won’t recognize the signs until it’s too late.
Sumn like dat.
-Jigabod
This video kills me, to see more like it from the same comedians checkout my friend’s blog. The male penis fascinates me, I love hearing stories about its daily adventures and mishaps (especially the embarassing ones). The fact that men own this body part that they have little to no control over is mind boggling and downright entertaining. Is what happens in this video common, what about wet dreams or out of the blue woodies? (fav line: you call it premature – I call it exctasy). If any guys are brave enough to share any Rogue tales that would be swell (pun intended).
It’s Friday so I figured why not keep it light!
When I was 18, I thought I was going to be a father.
18 and I was scared like a motherf**ker. I remember the world seem so conquerable, I was just brash thinking I ruled the world and it revolves around me. No fear, just the zeal of a young black man, then fear clouded me when I was giving reason to implicate that I was going to be father. Responsible for an entity when I will still clawing to my own mother’s tit. The potential bearer of my child was’nt my ideal partner considering it was just a one-night fling, a fling of unprotected sex and uncontrollable ejaculation. I remember being paranoid. Pensieve. I was thinking “What THE F**K*”. In the aftermath, the world didnt seem conquerable anymore, it stopped revolving and became still. A fervent stillness where you impatiently waiting for something to happen, for a moment to come, in which non-pertaining sounds were just white noise. I was scared but I was ready. I knew that at 18, I would have to responsible but my partner did not feel the same. So, she made a decision in which I had no say in, her womb became a tomb.
I still have emotional wounds of thoughts of what could’ve been. Years have past and I can’t run away from it all. I have a friend who made the choice to commit to the same decision. I would ask her why and she counters with the same question, adding that she’s not ready, no money, barely hopes for herself but I still cannot come to the terms how a complete innocent life has no say if he/she could live.
This ain’t my world, I’m living in it. Living.
David D
Trey Songz is notorious for his very candid and often T.M.I. interviews on sex. And despite all of the absurd things about their sex life that I’ve heard celebrities say, this quote truly shocked me:
Trey have you ever gotten anything before?
When I was like 16 or 17, this girl gave me crabs. It was the most uncomfortable shit in the world. I was confused because ain’t nobody know I was having sex. So I was like damn what the f*ck is going on? I even had to cut all my hair off and I had to eventually tell somebody. And had to go to the doctor.
I actually thought this was great! My little sex-ed receptors were tingling with delight because it’s great to hear a celebrity admit that sexually transmitted infections do happen! Furthermore that you do need to seek medical help no matter how small the problem is. The rest of the interview is trash but this lil snippet right here gets a thumbs up from my end. I talk about in LAID how during my teen years I didn’t really think protection was a priority since I never really heard of my friends or celebs catching anything – but that’s only because who would tell people if they did get burned. I wish more people were real about it like Mr. Songz.
